"maybe you wouldnt be so tired if you went to bed earl-"


(via crappybird)

@2 days ago with 454421 notes

my sarcasm is at it’s best when I hear a stupid question

(Source: wificrisis, via crappybird)

@2 days ago with 173117 notes


I hate when people mention someone in their life by their name without providing me with any context about who this person is.

“So Dylan and I went to yoga class yesterday — ”

Hold it right there. Who the fuck is Dylan. Your boyfriend? Your arch nemesis? Your brother? Your pet sea monkey? Your therapist? Your favourite fictional character? Are you on a first-name basis with your dad? Last-name basis with Bob? WHO THE FUCK IS DYLAN.

(via chriscolfur)

@2 days ago with 35561 notes


i dont get it but i’ll reblog it anyway cause it has 30,000 notes

(Source: surprisebitch, via pizza)

@5 months ago with 121361 notes



Gaga broke about 117,00 twitter records, and to this day is the only person to have the most followers on twitter and Facebook, have the most google searches and the #1 YouTube video simultaneously, homegirl can have a “retweet” lyric if she damn well pleases.

her hip

(via cyberho)

@6 months ago with 7645 notes


on a scale of fake pockets to nachos how good is your idea

(Source: sanastark, via pizza)

@6 months ago with 754914 notes

(Source: kiljayden, via cyberho)

@6 months ago with 689609 notes


dogs deserve to live forever

(via octopusdofleini)

@6 months ago with 706012 notes


50% of my jokes are self deprecating and 50% are self congratulatory like i’ll say “wow its hot in here…. just like me” and 5 seconds later point at a trash can and say “me”

(Source: soufflles, via crappybird)

@2 days ago with 330971 notes

"Sometimes, it’s easier to tell a stranger something very personal. It`s like there’s less risk, opening yourself up to someone who doesn’t know you."

Linwood Barclay (via hplyrikz)

(Source:, via inspiredbyyourlies)

@2 days ago with 12202 notes


#Just so you guys know, I’m still Blaine. Even though I am not wearing my uniform I am still Blaine. I don’t want you guys to get confused you know. Because I’m not in my uniform I don’t want you to think I’m someone else. I know it’s hard I mean sometimes my friends change clothes and I’m like OMG WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE. It can be super confusing, I mean I spent the first two seasons of Hannah Montana completely unaware that Miley and Hannah were played by the same actress. I mean talk about a total mindfuck! Amiright Kurt! But I’m Blaine. Blaine Anderson. I’m just not wearing my uniform today.
@5 months ago with 8009 notes


when you listen to a song for the first time aND YOU JUST KNOW

(via pizza)

@5 months ago with 260141 notes

(Source: fallforwatson, via zavocado)

@6 months ago with 598588 notes
#this movie is so cute 




i dont understand why do so many people make this mistake??

(via chriscolferr)

@6 months ago with 110384 notes



What else could you be doing with your hands if they aren’t pleasing me


(Source: keyote, via pizza)

@6 months ago with 19250 notes